Flying Pig...Swine Flew...

Bad jokes abound about this. Let me just say for the record - I laugh so hard (secretly) that I almost snort at each and every one of them. However, they are bad. Bad. Bad. And my Dad should never be allowed to tell them.

That said, the Flying Pig marathon is Sunday. As in 2 days from now Sunday. I'm still having a bit of trouble with getting in and out of cars successfully without pain, let alone standing and sitting. Basically, I'm nervous as hell that I'm going to try it and it's going to hurt. Bad. As bad as those stupid jokes hurt normal people without retardedly bad senses of humor.

I'm equally scared NOT to try this thing, as I HAVE spent quite a few hours running in preparation for it. Granted, not nearly the amount of hours I SHOULD have spent prepping for it, but I DID do a 16 miler and I DID do that whole Ironman thing last year. I know just how bad it CAN suck. The question is, will this hurt THAT bad? And will I be able to justify pushing through the pain OR giving in to the pain? What's the likelihood that this could cause more damage to the rest of my season? (Couldn't cause any more damage than flipping and snapping the bike, in all reality..still working on that whole replacement thing...from multiple angles. Someone's probably going to wind up mad at some point - I just hope it's not me)

So....we're driving over tonight. I'm going to pack all of my running stuff and all the compression gear and Ace bandages I own and all the painkillers I can get my hands on.

I was scared before Silverman. It was an odd feeling to be scared that I couldn't do something. (I'm apparently a fairly confident person....) Somewhere, deep down, I knew I could do it by just keeping going. There wasn't any injury or voodooscarycrap that was inside my head telling me I couldn't. I just had to deal with it. I'm not feeling so peppy about this ordeal right now. I'm scared I can't do it - not that I mentally can't but that my body will physically not let me. Or that I will try and fail. Or that I will try and hurt myself. Or that I will not try and regret that.

Rock, meet hard place. Let's do this thing and prove again that I can do any damn thing I set my mind to. I'm not going to qualify for Boston. I'm not even sure I can beat my Silverman time....but I'm pretty sure that, to me, finishing this thing might be a bigger accomplishment than that whole Ironman in a thunderstorm and hail thing....